Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Blogs To Leave You With

Ok! Well, I think that's it for this adventure...I'm glad I finally wrapped it up! I don't have plans right now to post all the photos in albums but I may get inspired to in the future when I'm not traveling and my time frees up. For now, I am already deep into my next adventure, out in South Dakota and running daily to fundraise for the next! You can follow me at my 'summer blog' -



and here are some other blogs/sites you might want to keep in your sights...

some friends mentioned on these trips!:
JENNIFER FALK GRAY (Neenah, WI) - poetry and other thoughts

GERRY CHING (Chicago, IL) - manning a Mobile Prayer Station in Wicker Park

ALLY SPOTTS (Portland, OR) - mostly about Christian dating/relationships

& other websites related to Leaving Brixton posts:
ART

www.michellehan.com (NY) - prints, paintings
www.andysanchez.com (NM) - furniture

KIDS' CLOTHING

www.magpiebymariegurule.com (NM) - screen-printing

MUSIC

www.farewellcontinental.com (MN) - noisy intelligent pop
www.katjones.bandcamp.com (TN) - folk & rock/alternative
www.myspace.com/naelid (WA) - acoustic/folk kinda like India Arie

PREACHING

www.urbanchapelministries.com (IN) - Tom Robbins, planted w/in Chicago

Thanks so much for being a part of my travels this past May/June!

Besos & blessings, Christy

Growing Up: Relationships

The second area I think I was mentored in the most is relationships. I stayed with an enormous number of married couples on my journey, and my favorite question to ask couples is "how did you meet?" Second favorite is probably "how did you know you wanted to marry them?" Third would be something like, "Do you have any words of wisdom for unmarried folks or younger couples?"

Here are some stories & advice that I remember:

- From my friend Cassandra, a memorable 3-pointer... 1) Make sure they're the one, 2) Make extra sure they're the one, and 3) Have only one person handle the money. (She used to work for a bank, and often draws up budgets for couples she is friends with to help them out.)

- From Andy Sanchez... Marry someone not because you can live with them, but because you can't live without them. Marry your best friend. And if they aren't someone you can't live without yet, keep dating them and give it more time.

- From Anonymous... I was unwilling to stay in an unhappy marriage because I had observed my parents do that for so long, so I talked to [my spouse] and said [this serious issue] needed to change or I would leave. [My spouse] knew I was serious, and changed. So we have a very happy marriage.

- From Anonymous... We have a good marriage, but it has been a difficult one. The year we married, we had [a severe incident] happen in our family, and spent a lot of time helping other folks and neglected our relationship. It was kind of a sandy foundation, not very strong. We've never been unfaithful, but we have had difficulty connecting ever since.

- From Anonymous (on counseling)... I came from a great family with no baggage, but the only thing I regret about our premarital counseling was that we didn't have more. Three years into our marriage we had some counseling, and I realized that in order to have a fair fight, I needed to give my husband time to think things over. I'm really good with saying things 'on the spot' so I'd win all the arguments. But then he'd bring the thing up again later when I thought we had already discussed it. So now, when we have to discuss something, even though it's hard for me, we'll agree to a time or day to discuss it and he'll have time to think things over in advance. That's helped a lot.

I wish I'd taken more notes during the trip because I know these weren't the only words of wisdom/experience that were shared with me. However, I think that time does the job sometimes of sorting out what you remember and carry with you. :) I hope these are helpful to y'all. Any other stories/advice you'd like to add to the mix?

Growing Up: Being Your Own Boss

You may have noticed in my blog description, the curious statement, "This is a story about growing up." This bothered me when I wrote it, and still bothers me. I don't know why I wrote it, and now, even in retrospect, it isn't QUITE clear. It would have seemed the opposite is true, yes? When you leave normal life and gallivant around the country visiting old friends, it isn't what is popularly thought of as growing up. It's kids who get to not work and to live and explore from day to day.

Well. I've thought about it a bit, and I do see two areas in which I was mentored on this trip, which might contribute to my 'growing up'. Here are my thoughts on the first:

AREA #1: Being Your Own Boss

One of the things I admire most is when people really take initiative in using their gifts and building something new...often at great cost to themselves, but the intangible rewards then seem to far outweigh the inconveniences.

A few examples that stood out to me were:

1) My friend Michelle Han. Having seen many bits and parts of her journey from PR employee & freelance writer to full-time artist with 3-4 employees working for her, she's probably the biggest 'success story' I've had close access to. And walking through much of that with her, praying weekly together, I know it has not been easy. You know, they say when you work for yourself, you only have to work 1/2 the time - but you get to choose which 12 hours! She's now a home-owner with a few other couples, has a dog she loves muchly and has her work showing at flea markets and art openings all over the city. I would often say to her, as this process began, "Seriously. Your stuff is better than 95% of what I see out there." and I still stand by that. If you do something well, you should make it happen!

2) My cousin Marie Gurule. She's still in the beginning stages of her screen-printing business where she is working a regular job and doing her business on the side, but it's really cool to see what she's doing and the steps she's taking to accomplish it!

3) Andy Sanchez. His furniture and art business is by far the most established family biz I observed while on the road and it was awesome to be walked through his shop and life, with all the bits and pieces explained. We even stood and talked for a long time about the system he came up with to come up with fair prices for his work, taking into account both what the market value is, and the actual cost of what it takes to run the shop and pay all the workers.

There were many others that stood out to me along the way - Erel Pilo, whose singer-songwriters & storytellers 'variety show' of sorts succeeded so well that she now has a monthly spot at the venue we performed at; Ally Spotts, who traveled to all 50 states with a friend blogging and working on writing a book; Cory Kaufman and his hammered dulcimer hammers; Keith York who has a painting business and travels; my cousin Sara Malnar who is organizing an enormous musical outreach in New Mexico; and Dan Cooper, my former boss, who is working on books and other projects on the side... Thank you to all of you, and more that I haven't mentioned. I think I have a lot to learn still about perseverance and entrepreneurialism (sp?), but...I think that connecting & re-connecting with all these folks has been a really positive look at choosing how to shape our lives. Whether we succeed or fail in these endeavours, we have taken the risk... and that seems invaluable to me.