Day 35 - Goodbye San Fran! Hello LA!

Day 35 = June 13

Pix of cute things in my SF host home:

(my mustachioed hostess Liz on right and left)

Breakfast was at Tartine w/Jason. He let me off on Sunday night as long as I had promised to have breakfast at Tartine. It is apparently not to be missed. He had taken Jon Tyson (pastor of the Trinity Grace Churches in NYC) there several times when he stayed w/him and Jon had taken dearly to their famous morning muffins which have orange marmalade in the middle but are made somewhat like cinammon buns. I must admit, they are pretty great. Sorry, I forgot to take any pics there. It was great to have had so much time to talk and hang with him. And kind of weird saying goodbye. I’m not likely to be back in San Fran very soon I don’t think, and it’s likely that whenever we see each other next we’ll be old & married. At least old! Haha. :)

Took my flight to LA and happily reunited with my friend Simona. She, her son Amos, and our friend Lena’s daughter Elizabeth, all came along to welcome me. We then drove into Silver Lake and picked up Tommy from the venue (The Satellite) for a short hang. Ended up going to Fatburger for a late lunch. You can imagine, from the name. Great, awful-for-you food. Mm-mm.

Dropped by Simona’s & met she & Ernesto’s awesome cat, Benjamin Button (female). She apparently looked very ugly and old when purchased, but connected best w/their son Amos. She is a total sweetheart. Tommy held her like a baby, as usual.

We dropped him back by the venue for load in & sound check and returned back to the apt. I napped and etc. and then met Ed Carey (pastor of Hope Int'l - the church which shares the building with Kairos which I helped start in 2002-2005 along w/Simona & many other friends) and drove over to The Satellite w/him.

(photo stolen from Facebook)

He's kinda like a Sean Connery character guy, I say. Tough and loving at the same time. You don't ever wanna be on his bad side, but you're super blessed if you're on his good side. :) When he took over Hope Int'l ten years ago or more, he was saving a dying church. It's about 70-80 yrs old now? Anyway, he came in and interviewed everyone to see what the problems were. Found out the choir was the stage of most of the divisions and took it out w/a sledge hammer in his first service. No kiddin'.

It's doing well now. Every day they get about 2 tons of leftover food from Trader Joe's delivered, which goes out to about 5 ministries, from one small room! They also have a recovery house for addicts there. When I walk in to the church, the steps are like a scene from the pool of Bethesda in the Bible. The poor, the halt, the lame, the blind... (I don't know what 'the halt' means, just have heard it a bunch - is that King James English??) It definitely gives the feeling that the kingdom of God is coming to earth. Anyhow, when the 60+ young folks from across the country came out (mostly from the VA Tech area) to start Kairos, he took a special shine to the raggedy bunch of us from MN (7 or 8 of us), as we seemed to be sort of afterthoughts to the group. So he was pretty excited to meet Tommy and come out & support. Yay!

We also met my friends Vinay & Stacey and my friend Shannon at the venue. Stacey was a roomie of mine in LA and one of the 8 or so folks from MN. She met Vinay in LA and they married in Vegas - everyone has to have one friend marry there, right? Shannon and Stacey and I were all assistant store managers at Spruce together in 2003, which was an environmentally friendly dry-cleaning chain starting up. ANYWAY. It was great to connect up together! Always is. Here's a pic of us (L to R - Shannon, Stacey, me):

So, the show! It rocked, as usual. I tried to soak it all in as it's my last FC show for a little while. Last night to see Tommy. Shannon, standing next to me, looked over and said, "They are really good." I said, "yeah, they better be! this is my 8th show in one month!" I forget how thankful I should be about that. Because I liked Tommy before I'd ever seen them play, before our trips mystically intertangled and all that. How awkward 'twould have been if I hadn't adored them!

After the show, my friends needed to take off, but Tommy had introduced us all to a fan who I believe caught all 3 of the shows near/in LA - Angelia Jones. She drove me out to the Cafe 101 or whatever it is called, to have some late night snax w/the FC band & friends. This included some tuna melts & chocolat-y ice cream goodness if I remember correctly. Soo sooooooo tired tho'. Ach! It was nice to have some last last moments before Tommy shot off into the last leg of his trip, but wow, keeping eyes open was very hard. One last hug goodbye after, and Angelia drove me home. Goodbye FC crew! I'll not see my bonny boy after this for 10 long days, until I get home. We'll make it. Just sad to see him go.

Day 34 – San Francisco (continued)

Day 34 = June 12

About Jason. He was a worship pastor in New York City at Mosaic. I never saw him lead worship there, we just met when my friend Emily and I helped with some city-wide worship events. We sang, Jason guitared, and a bunch of other persons were involved as well. Now Emily is married and living in New Zealand, and Jason is an Arts Advocate (/Pastor) in San Fran, the absolute other side of the continent. He is as excited about SF as he was about Brooklyn, which makes his loyalties a little suspicious, but hey… he’s a person who loves his neighborhood, which can’t be said of everyone. Oh & also, having been dating Kristen, the love of his life, there, hasn’t hurt his love for the town either I should think. She was out of town, so I didn’t get to meet her, but I heard good things & saw some happy pix. :)

So, his new position is at IKON, a small new-ish church start-up that is only a year or two old and meets in the San Francisco Chronicle building. It has 2 services and I went to the later one, for obvious reasons (sleeping in J ). On my way I had some bus complications (I waited at 2 wrong bus stops before finding the correct one, because one street was split in two over a freeway which was a little confusing). No matter. But once I was on the ground, motoring my way as fast as my little legs could carry me over to the Chronicle building, a woman caught my eye. She was a slightly older African American woman, and she leaned out and said to me, “Where are you going?” I said, “5^th & Mission!” (I don’t know why I’m so honest) She said, “You ever been to church?” Me: “That’s where I’m goin’!” She said, as I left her behind, “Well, it’s GREAT in here!” almost to herself and it sounded like she really meant it. The doors must have swung open around there and I think I heard some great gospel music pouring out. It made me wish I wasn’t in such a hurry and that I had 5 min. to peek in and see what was up. That was over at Taylor & Ellis for you San Franciscans. Check it out sometime! :)

I liked IKON. One of my favorite songs they did was “Your Love is Strong” by Jon Foreman of Switchfoot. After looking it up online, I think their version was even better than the original, but here ‘tis if you’d like to check it out.

After church, Olga – my poetry friend who I met thru Jason but hadn’t met before in person – and I went over to Blue Bottle for some coffee. Ok, just hot chocolate for me, but isn’t it beautiful?

One thing that is really interesting/unique about San Fran is their penchant for communal eating/drinking. They make maximum use of the small mileage of the city by installing long tables where everyone sits together. Blue Bottle for example:

We had a great talk. Was really nice to have some time together in person! If you'd like to check out Olga's baby/project extraordinaire, Vetted Word, here's the place.

Then I jumped on a train to go up to Jason’s neighborhood. He showed me the apt. he shares w/some guys from IKON and I met the roomies briefly, and then we went out for more exploring. First on his list (tho’ he couldn’t drink coffee because of his sickness) was Four Barrell, because I just needed to see how great it was. Ta-dah! –

Actually I think Tommy would be more appreciative of this, as he likes quality coffee. I’m not a very coffee-ish person, but I do like cozy venues.

Next was a lookout I was too hungry/tired to go to the day before. The full view of a city is important to get. I like that too, but I was also distracted by the various lovers getting their photos taken in front of San Fran without being blown off the lookout.

The hill had a ginormous cancer ribbon on it. I guess they have something different up there every year.

Then I wanted to attend the Haight-Ashbury Street Fair. It was the longest looking for parking I’ve ever spent I think. After a loooooooooooong while, I just suggested that Jason drop me off and I’d make it back on my own. So he went home for a nap, and I ventured into crazy street-fair life alone.

I encountered a lot of pro-marijuana organizations, and little dogs in cute outfits, and lots of tie-dye, etc. etc. It was pretty nice be at on a sunny afternoon, and I bargained a street vendor down on a little tie-dyed baby onesie with a peace sign for my friend Simona’s upcoming baby Asher.

After that, I consulted my notes and decided to save $2 by walking back to Fillmore instead of riding a bus. The nice thing about buses there – at least w/some of them! – is that they are connected to these lines that go over the road so if you need to go where they are going, you can kinda follow those and get where they’re going.

I then holed up in my host home, watched a movie I think, and took a nap. Jason checked in when he woke up from his but I said I was fine chilling for the eve. Later I went on over to The Grove and asked for my missing piece of pie which they apologized about and immediately delivered to me. I read for a while on my Kindle, and then I went walking up Fillmore. Up, and up and up to the view and down, down, down to the very sea (or about 50 feet away). I didn’t quite go up to it because there were no lights over the grass and I imagined it being full of high homeless people trying to sleep…and I also have a goal of not dying in any way my mother could say ‘I told you so’. I could see the search light spinning at Alcatraz in the distance. When I turned to go back, it was to a Great Effort that I returned. You walk down these hills at 45 degree angles, but getting back up them is another thing. It pretty much wipes you out.

Got back pretty late. Really wished I could have included these walks on my running blog, but alas it is only for running. Fell asleep immediately*.

* immediately usually means immediately after Tommy & I chat on the phone for a few min. every night...we are by no means very lucid and interesting in our late night goodnights and we both kind of hate the phone, but it's sweet nonetheless to hear each other's voices before 'signing out'. sorry if that is TMI, just thought it deserved a mention...)

50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend (41-50)

41. He has an embroidered piece of art from his grandma at his place, just like how my family has one from my great-grandma in their basement.

42. He comes up with brilliant analogies or diagrams at the drop of a hat.

43. He's a reader.

44. He gives people the benefit of the doubt, and a lot of grace.

45. He used to rock out for his stuffed animals as a kid.

46. He is an analog geek. Music people, you know what that means.

47. He has some cool tattoos – my favorite is the Morton salt umbrella girl on his left arm.

48. He is willing to walk out on faith – right now it means he is leaving his job of the last 3 years to travel and to launch his music ministry/consulting biz.

49. He is just off the wall funny, always makes me laugh.

50. He likes to sing death metal voices about soft things. Rah-rah-rah-rah – DAFF-o-dils. Rah-rah-rah-rah-pupp-ies!

* disclaimer on photos - I should mention I stole all the photos (I think all of them) for these posts from his FB photos so photo credit belongs to a # of disparate individuals. thank you to them!!

50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend (31-40)

31. He makes cute little drawrings.

32. He likes to go to thrift stores.

33. He communicates to me often what things about me he likes, and they are not shallow things/just my looks or talents.

34. He is mindful to be positive even when talking about tough things at work or in the past, careful not to be a complainer.

35. He plays acoustic guitar incredibly as well, even tho' he doesn't do that for the bands he is in.

36. He is reportedly a great electric guitarist, tho' I have never seen this. ;) (I wrote this list in April...now after 8 FC shows, I can now confirm the reports are true! :) )

37. He is careful not to take advantage of people's generosity, but is able to receive.

38. He has no debt.

39. He is amazingly humble for being so rockingly awesome.

40. He likes owls/owl-y things.

50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend (21-30)

21. He comes up with random ideas all the time – "let's make a fort"; "I'm going to build a fledermaushaus"(Ger., bat house), "let's pick berries when it gets warmer", etc...

22. He has a great beard.

23. His eyes are blue like the sky, with brown flecks the color of our shag carpeting in the 70s. Yay, childhood. :)

24. He cares about and guards my/our purity.

25. He loves to worship.

26. He likes biking and running (or at least chooses to do both!).

27. He wants to start a ministry to church plants, to travel and train (music) ministry teams.

28. He encourages me to express my talents (singing, writing, performing, etc.)

29. He gives me time to discover my calling and does not see mine as secondary to his.

30. He has good fashion sense.

Day 32 - Welcome to San Francisco! (& Emeryville)

Day 32 = June 10

First of all, I have to give a HUGE shout out to Nathan Akers who I met only once in NY w/a friend of his, at an IAM (int'l arts something) conference, and showed about a bit. When my friend Olga (known only via internet/my friend Jason) turned out to have someone already staying on her couch for the whole month of June, I was forced to reach out to find some other ladeez to stay with. Thankfully, I'd misdialed Nathan a few months prior to the trip, tho' I hadn't seen him for years since the conference, and we'd had a quick catch up via text. So, when Facebook came up with him as the only other person I knew in SF, it wasn't TOO too weird to write & ask if he had any lady friends who liked company. He actually had to be in Ohio for a wedding during my visit, but knew some girls, who turned out to be lovely hostesses! Thank you Liz, Lindsey, Christa & Jessie - you were great and I am SO thankful you were open to a total stranger crashing on your couch. :)

Overnight on the train, Tommy & I had discovered an excellent fact via our texts. My train ticket took me into Emeryville and then provided a thruway bus into San Fran. Coincidentally, HIS HOTEL was also in Emeryville. We decided I just wouldn't get on the bus and I'd spend the day before the show w/him in Emeryville. When I came in in the morning, I discovered two additional awesome facts:

1) Amtrak would let me use the bus ticket at ANY time, not just at the 8:25 am printed on it.

2) Tommy's hotel was 1 or 2 blocks away!

Life is good. He met me for coffee/breakfast next to the train station, and then when most of the band had left for wineries (Justin still around working in the hotel), we headed over. I took a quick shower and we went out shopping for some stuff Tommy needed: a hoodie, a swimsuit, etc. A pet shop was visited as well - I think Tommy had wanted to see hamsters? Here's a lazy hamster & a few cute mice:

Then we had lunch & came back for a quick visit to the pool/hot tub at the hotel before everyone re-arrived and had to leave for the venue. It was splendid. So nice to have some low key time together.

The band left then and I hopped on the bus into SF. A friendly girl named Michelle helped me find the right stop to get where I was going. It was still going to be a walk. I walked a ways up to Sutter, the street where I was staying, and stepped into a Starbucks for some internet/planning & a snack. I figured out a taxi would be ideal for getting to my destination and set out for one. One by one, every taxi passed me by, even empty ones. I have since found from locals that it is impossible to hail a taxi and it is better to call one. In any case, I was walking uphill w/fairly heavy luggage and was not particularly pleased with the situation as it wasn't doing my arms any favors. In a moment of desperation, I prayed: "God, would you please do something cool?"...hoping for some random stranger to offer a free ride or something, I don't know. Just a minute or two later, I was walking up past a hotel where a valet and limo driver were standing. I looked less than happy with my burden but was soldiering on. The limo driver said, "do you want a ride?" I laughed and said, "yes, but no thank you, I can't afford you". He asked where I was going and then offered to take me there for $10. Sold. He said, "let's take a picture!" - how nice is that? He totally took this picture for me, and was such a perfectionist he said (when I said it was fine) that we could take a better one later. That makes me laugh.

Ok. So yes, I like you at this moment, San Francisco. It's a decent welcome. :)

Met my roomies for the 3 days all right away. They were all around for a bit and then scattered out to their night destinations. I called to confirm the later start for the show and gratefully took a nap before leaving. Travel sometimes takes it out of you, and I was starting to hit 'the wall'.

The commute to bottom of the hill, the venue they were playing, included a long long long wait for a bus. But I met a journalist at the bus stop, Ryder W. Miller, who told me much about SF while I waited. He kind of adopted me and made it his business to make sure I made it to my destination, when the buses were not running as advertised. This was comforting, as was his height - he was very tall - as I figured w/such an imposing guide I would be quite safe. We chatted re: poetry & etc...and he told me about the Haight-Ashbury Street Fair which I ended up visiting on Sunday, so our meeting was quite fruitful. :)

Finally, however, I arrived at 'bottom of the hill', which everyone I spoke to on the bus journey seemed to think highly of. It was a larger and much more energetic crowd than the first two nights. Gold Motel, the band who was opening for FC at all their shows, played - in my opinion - their best show of the tour at this venue.

Farewell Continental played a less precise/more messy show this night, but it was full of personality and I think they had a lot of fun with the energy of the crowd. :)

I left soon after the show because of the long commute back, but it was uneventful and thankfully quick in comparison with commute out. I was out in moments after hitting home.

50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend (11-20)

11. He likes words & has an excellent vocabulary.

12. He is a CUDDLER in capital letters. I loooooove cuddling.

13. He sings the street signs while driving.

14. He calls me his "lady-friend" (or come to think of it, sings that usually, too).

15. He smells awesome.

16. He has a mentor & believes in mentoring.

17. He knows everyone. People are always coming up to him for hugs. Everywhere.

18. He jokes with the cashier at the grocery store.

19. He drums (in Party House) so amazingly & effortlessly, like he could do it while he is sleeping.

20. He is a competent, creative & confident music producer and makes it fun for everyone.

50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend (1-10)

1. He has stuffed animals in his car.
2. He writes me letters, even though he lives 2 blocks away.
3. He likes praying with me and suggested that we pray every time we are together, which we mostly do.
4. He is a traveler like me.
5. He is brave about awkward moments and just speaks out the awkwardness, which puts everyone at ease.
6. He brings groceries to people who need them, and visits them.
7. He has a serious face much of the time but is super cheery inside. :)
8. He holds cats and dogs like they are babies.
9. He opens doors for me.
10. He is a poetic soul, which comes out in his letters, articles, and profound Facebook statii.

Who in the World is Tommy Rehbein?

You may have asked yourself this question while reading this blog. It is becoming the thing everyone wants to know first when I come to town, and I get little notes from folks demanding to know the story! "Who is this boyfriend and how did you meet him?" SO, this isn't the WHOLE story, but it is a leetle bit to hopefully quench a bit of your curiosity.

We met in mid-February at my church which is confusingly called 'Church in Uptown'. When I explain that I go to 'Church in Uptown', people always ask "Which church in Uptown?" to which I reply 'Church in Uptown' at The Beat Coffeehouse. "Oh, what is it called?" they ask. I shrug.

On my way to church - which I am ALWAYS 5 min+ late to or more tho' I am only a 15 min. walk away - it was snowing such a beautiful snow I became all Anne-of-Green-Gables-y and had nearly convinced myself that I would take everyone outside on a walk in it and THAT would be church. It was painful to go in with such loveliness outside. I desisted from this plan w/effort.

I had just been attending since sometime in the fall. Tommy doesn't go there, but he gets coffee at The Beat (which they own/run) nearly every day. On this particular Sunday, he noticed the Sunday church gathering was happening, and thought he'd sneak into the back & chill. At some point he gave me a little wave, but I found out that was because he thought I was his friend Katie Nelson, who I have now met, and now understand how such a confusion could be possible.

I'm the kind of person who thinks 'church' is kinda what happens in the relationships you make after the gathering, moreso even than the 'formal part' we think of as church...so I'm often one of the last to leave, and I try to get to know new peeps, just because I am unendingly curious about folks. Tommy was one of these this week, so we chatted for a long time. He was very interesting but extraordinarily hard to read. Kinda poker-faced? In any case, he was waiting for a ride home from the pastor, but that took for-ever and eventually I said I was going to leave & walk home. He asked where I lived, and when I mentioned the address, he said he lived on my street too, just a few blocks nearer, and offered to walk me part-way home.

Well, it definitely felt like a mistake by about a half block from the church, where the snow and wind were so crazy that it was hard to open your eyes much less have a conversation. Blizzarding. We tromped single-file through snow-heaped sidewalks and finally found ourselves at his door. He invited me in to warm up & have a bit of food if I so desired...normally, my answer to this question coming from a guy I'd just met (who only lived 2 blocks from me) would be "no, that's ok, I'm pretty close!", but my snow-trammelled self could only think "yes please!" in my eagerness to NOT be so. Anyway, I came in, ate & chatted a bit and whatnot, and went home when the weather gods were appeased. :) Over the next month or so we were happy neighbors, doing stuff w/our friends & my roomies etc. Music or tea or movies or art shows or whatever was happening. Recording in the studio, even. He even wrote me letters - to reply, I'd have to walk 3 blocks to the post office box to send a letter to him 2 blocks away. Pretty silly. But nice.

I began to realize during this time that I really was 'proud' of the person I was discovering he was, if that word makes any sense at all (like, if you can be 'proud' of someone you've only just met...the word almost has ownership to it - we are 'proud' of our parents, our leaders sometimes, our friends - you might admire strangers, but you rarely say you're proud of them). Somewhere at the end of March/beginning of April things began to come clear, words were put to the thoughts we were having, and we decided to give "us" a shot! It's more complicated & charming than that - the whole story - but I am tired of typing and want to go enjoy LA today, so you can ask me more in person. In the meantime, there is a list I made early on, of '50 Reasons I Like My Boyfriend' which I will post, 10 reasons per day, this next week. Enjoy!

Day 30 - Hello Portland!

Day 30 = June 8

The morning began with a beautiful train ride after goodbyes w/Cassandra which were bittersweet. Has been so nice to catch up, and we hope it won't be as long again until we catch up next time!

So, I arrive in Portland & make my way via bus to Ally Spotts' home. I didn't know Ally but she was a friend of Tommy's via some story about music & him playing drum for her friend Sharaya? She is pretty fascinating actually - she'd just returned, the day before I arrived, from Alaska, the last of the 50 states she and Sharaya traveled to together. Here is a pic, which I cannot take credit for (stolen from her FB):

You should read her blogs: Packing Light (on the 50-state travel) & Ally Spotts (subtitle is 'Quarter Life Crisis: Averted' & is much about dating...& yes, I did tell her she needs to chat w/the IKDH girls in Brooklyn!)

So, of the few folks I know in Portland, Cory Kaufman (who was on my 'brother floor' back at Moody Bible Institute) is one of the most talented, and I was on a mission - both to catch up w/him & meet his fam, and to beg him to let me use his photography in one of my future poetry chapbooks. I was successful on both counts! Please see Exhibit A below which shows some of his photographical awesomeness:

The following pics also show his adorable family: he & his wife Debbi, along w/their kids Rachel, Ben & Charlie (not sure I'm listing the twins in the right order there!), and his mother-in-law Esther who was by for the eve, w/their darling dog, Smokey.

Finally, as he was showing me some recent projects, one of them is that he is now designing & making hammers for hammered dulcimers. I thought they were very pretty. Here is a pic.

He is available for your hammered dulcimer needs in the Portland area & is looking for folks to play with. You can also view his website which features the hammers here.

Cory drove me over to the night's show and when I arrived at the venue (the Hawthorne Theater), I connected up with Tommy & our mutual old friend Laura Kucera who lives in Portland. Here are some cute pics of them:

We met up with another friend of theirs and wandered over to a smaller version of Powell Books to kill time before the show, which is supposed to be a solid mile of books or something! Since I was only in town for 1 day, it was nice to at least get 'a taste' of it. There was also some Stumptown coffee consumed and discussed. This is big Portland news, and they are reportedly opening a store in Brooklyn soon.

The show itself was excellent. I danced a good bit, couldn't help it. I told them afterward, it was such a 'complete experience' I wanted to say "Amen!" at the end.

My friend Rich Blatt, who came to the show, droveth me home, & we stopped for hot dogs & discussion of the years btwn now and the other concert we met at once about 7 yrs ago (or so) - The Violet Burning, somewhere in CA. Nice to catch up. He is recording a solo album right now - I have never heard him perform and the music player at myspace is not working now - but if it ever is, you can hear him at www.myspace.com/theirondog.

Day 29 - Seattle: Sushi, Gum, Books & Rock 'N' Roll

Day 29 = June 7

Pike’s place again! Cassandra volunteers at the hospital on Tuesday afternoons so I was delivered to Farewell Continental/Tommy & friends, for some sushi & some exploring time.

I finally saw the gum wall that I had bought a pic of back the first time we went (from John Wiley). I think this is Tommy's no-I-will-not-share-my-gum-with-this-disgusting-gum-wall look. Not sure. ;)

Justin was being his silly self

Tommy & he are blurry besties here:

Some child violence occurs when Jim is dared by Mia (daughter of Justin's friend Yoshi) to touch a piece of gum, whereupon he touches all the gum and runs around threatening to touch her with said polluted hand.

Eventually Jim is subdued and a victor is declared.

We visit a bookstore and Tommy buys a few books.

We deliver the band to the venue and I catch a bus or two back to Bellevue for a yummy pizza dinner from Garlic Jim’s w/Cassandra & Tom.

A MICHAEL CASTILLEJOS billboard is sighted! Toldja he’s everywhere.

Cassandra & I embark to the Vera Project for the night’s show, drive past a gorgeous sunset,

meet Tommy’s new homeless friend Zach, & some other not-homeless friends of his,

...and it is an awesome show. Afterward, we go out just the three of us for some snacks/drinks & for Cass & Tommy get-to-know-you time. On the way back we stop to see Seattle by night from Kerry Park. Pretty.